got sidetracked on wormy lips…this weekend–
I didnt get to go to dc, or really “get away” as I had wanted to. Instead, C and I went shopping, hung around. ate a lot, watched a lot of tv, read a lot of magazines, and then yesterday, went to Santa Cruz to go to the beach/boardwalk.
It was the first time in i guess 6 weeks or so when the constant pain in my neck and arm completely dissolved away–at least for like 3 hrs. I love the beach. It was so warm and relaxing, and I love falling asleep to the sound of water and seagulls and people laughing around me. And even though I feel so chubbers from my long hours at work, I actually felt decent in my 2-piece, or at least wasnt self-conscious about it. So it was good. very chill.
we tried to drive back to see the fireworks on the wharf, but to no avail. we were so close, and could see the glowing skies where the fireworks were being shot…but we were stuck in traffic. oh well, even though it was excruciating driving back, we somehow were able to make it fun…or at least laugh about it.
4th of july is always a weird turning point of sorts for me. Maybe bc its mid-summer. Maybe bc everything seems to come to a head at this point, at least relationship-wise. Last yr, I was planning to go to nyc to visit my ex, who, as expected, was a complete jerk to me telling me that he didnt want me there, and if i did visit, that he didnt want to sleep with me. As if.
A couple years before, when I lived in Austin still, I flew to SF to be with X2. He met me here and we spent an amazing weekend together. 4 days later, he wasnt returning his phone calls. Less than a week later, he broke up with me completely out of the blue.
The year before that, Frenchy fucking ditched me or we got into a fight where he said he didnt want to be w/me anymore or something. I ended up alone on the 4th, crying, watching fireworks on tv.
But I guess if there is such thing as yin and yang, then 2 years prior to that, i spent one of the best 4th of julys w/X2 in SF. We were both here soul-searching, and maybe thats the worst time to meet someone, but it always seems like the most meaningful–when 2 people who have no idea whats going on in their lives find some sort of common ground w/one another. Anyway, SF was my stopping point after a long road trip I took by myself. It was X2’s second place on his road trip. We met on July 4th, and drove around the city chasing fireworks. Best time in my life.
I guess thats the price you pay. 1 awesome 4th of July for 4 crappy ones.
This one was okay. Not too shabby. Actually, overall good. Its as C’s horoscope said–we are learning to make lemonade out of lemons. Something like that.
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On another note–1 of my friends got engaged (oddly enough, she was here 2 july 4ths ago). C actually has like 3 people she knows who just got engaged. I only know about a bazillion people who just got pregnant. weird. And meanwhile…
On that note–what is it with people who, when they find a bf/gf, stick to them as if they are their oxygen tank. ITS SO FUCKING ANNOYING.
On the lemonade note–Im really really glad for the fellow singletons in my life. They rule. Time will tell if they fall into the same trap as previously mentioned, but for now, they make being single awesome. Sure, I wouldnt mind dating, but at the same time, I am really do not see myself in a serious relationship. So I guess thats cool in a way, right?
